#9 In the end, it all comes down to one question: Are you trustworthy?

In any relationship or transaction, what you actually deal in is trust.
It is less about ice-cream, clothes, consulting, or law services than it is about trust.
The same goes for your lover, your marriage, your kids, your friends. Same for your presidential candidate. Same for the vaccine to end this pandemic… Anything.
What you expect – and what you offer –  is TRUST.

Back to our question. Are you trustworthy?
My guess is we know when we are, and we know when we are not.

Notice that I haven’t said “IF” but “WHEN”.

Using “IF” would imply that there are only 2 categories: those who are trustworthy and those who are not. I don’t believe in this binary; There is no such thing as Manichaeism when it comes to humans. The grey area, and its thousands of nuances represents the majority.
Besides, we are all evolving and changing constantly in real life.

Using “when” is indeed a sweet reminder that nothing has to be taken for granted.  We are sometimes not as reliable as we could be, or as we would want to be. Right?
That’s fair, “life happens” as we say.

However, playing your cards right is what you are in charge of, regardless of what life is offering at the moment to hijack you: a delayed train, a sick kid, a packed agenda, a more appealing invitation, a sudden desire to cancel your appointment… All are facts. Only facts.
If you integrate them as part of the game, anticipating that they may occur and sculpting the best configuration to honor your words anyway, you won’t allow yourself to use them as an excuse to lower your standards.

If you want to assess your reliability, I don’t recommend you do a 360° soul-search, scanning the personal and professional situations in which you are involved. That would be boring and not empowering.
Here is a better way to become more aware AND to make improvements in this field, all at once ; two birds, one stone.

Act this way this week
pay closer attention to each of your interactions, to each of your projects, to each of your relationships, so that you can honor your reliability in every moment.
By doing so you‘ll quickly identify the situations which require more of your care.

1. When your alarm clock rings in the morning, how do you deal with it?
   (Reliability is an early bird)
2. When you are working with your partner, are you walking the talk?
3. For your meetings, do you show up right on time? Are you ready and prepared to give your best?
4. When you stand for something, are you able to stand for it the same way regardless who is in front of you?
5. When sending a report, is your work reflecting what you agreed on?
6. When you say “Yes Honey, I’ll be home for dinner at 8” or “Sure buddy, let’s go running this Saturday morning,” are you ready to say no to any other solicitations to be able to honor your words?

In this realm, only actions have impact.
Every relationship involves trustworthiness, starting with the most important one: the one you have with yourself.
Taking care of your reliability is actually a powerful way to build self-esteem and confidence.
By honoring your engagements day after day, you are building a life-long ethic that will provide you solid ground to build on anything you dream about.
Wherever your starting point is, each day is a great new opportunity for you to become MORE trustworthy. Start today, stay the course, one moment at a time.