“Working with your opposite style is always the best combination! If you are an optimist, you’d do better to partner with a pessimist. And the same goes for couples!”
Where to begin…
The skeptic in me: Should I start by challenging the notion that partnering with a pessimist would be solely and unequivocally beneficial for an optimist? And vice versa.
Or,
The hot-head in me: Should I start by demolishing the established comparison between Business and Love here?
Believe me, I’ve tested the glass-half-empty boyfriend, and I would sooner go to hell (i.e., remain single forever).
Now, that said ;
- I agree that a marriage of differences brings us to farther places than when we are both wired, thinking, and acting the same way. No doubt about that.
- I also concede that having a pessimistic partner would definitely open my eyes on scenarios and downsides that I would never think of alone. DE-FI-NI-TE-LY.
- And I cannot refute the great capacity of contrasted couples for forging lasting relationships. My parents are still together after 40 years and I challenge anyone to find more extreme differences between them. Night and Day.
So yes, maybe there’s something to this.
Would an optimist benefit from a pessimistic partner?
By broadening his spectrum for risk analysis, the optimist should be grateful for having a cautious, careful, or conservative partner.
At some point, however it may deprive them of the optimistic impulses or momentum that not only fulfill them but are an integral part of their definition and process for success.
There is a missing piece, an unspoken sacrifice that exists in spite of the legitimate benefits we ascribe to these pairings—the fine print one must be aware of.
This missing piece is that there is a TAX.
The Dualistic Tax.
And this cost is worth considering here, it alone can dissolve and annul all the projected/expected beneficial outcomes we outlined earlier.
This special tax for diametric systems belongs to a longer list of Energy Taxes, however here the State is not the collector.
It is a tax because it is a due, no one can get away from it, and this is not a flat tax. Each of us must spend a different amount of energy depending on various factors; openness to differences, ability to adapt oneself, alignment with respective goals, alignment in respective personal needs for fulfillment, etc…
The more different the two parts are in their personalities and tastes, the more they must share values and rules to stick together and look in the same direction.
From personal experience, at times this Dualistic Tax has been so demanding that I’ve lost faith and desire in my efforts for mutual success. It may have been perfect on paper, but in reality it drained me, and slowly but surely I fizzled.
Don’t fall into the modern trap of believing that all oppositions and differences are not only complementary, healthy, or efficient, but also tax-free… only to feel guilt when it doesn’t work out.
Wherever you are on the spectrum, your job is to know where this point lies and to draw from the best of both worlds with an energetic cost - A Dualistic Tax you can afford.
At least the Dualistist Tax is one of the few taxes (if not the only one) that we are compelled to pay by our own personal consent.
Grab your favorite coffee or tea (I'm a tea person, I know, nobody is perfect ;p), and enjoy that 3-5 minutes reading a new post about Achievement and Alignement every Sunday.
Get stimulated, questionned, guided, and inspired for the week coming
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